Remember your teens? #19 is here...

#19: The Disclaimer...no, that is really what #19 is...

I mean aren't the teens known for being full of smart comments and sarcasm?

The Mountain Xpress is our local free news/arts/entertainment/classifieds paper. It comes out on Wednesdays and buried within its pages is a piece of satire that will keep you laughing from dawn until dusk. The Asheville Disclaimer is Asheville's fake news page within the Mountain X. The great thing about the Disclaimer is that nothing and no one is off limits. Everyone gets a fair shake down!

For instance this was the "top story" in the disclaimer this week:

Obama, 1st Family Visiting Asheville: President reportedly has eye on decorative mushroom-shaped table-skull from Octopus' Garden

The article following was a riot! The Disclaimer also has a couple of regular columns such as "Kid care with Arnold" in which a Korean War Veteran dispenses indispensable child rearing advice! One of my personal favorites is the Fur it or Agin' it column in which a local gas station clerk gives her opinion Fur or Agin' any number of things...priceless...

So some of you are at this point thinking that I have lost it. This countdown was supposed to be about wholesome tourist attractions and moderately priced restaurants! You must not know us...because if you did you would know that it is all the little things that make up why you love something or somewhere and sometimes those things aren't your run of the mill type things. So thank you Disclaimer for making the fake news sound better than the actual news!

WARNING: Some of you may be offended by the Disclaimer that is not our fault. That is our Disclaimer disclaimer.

Oh, and in case you hadn't heard this from your Google news feed here is the latest from the Disclaimer:

-Local black hair stylist not as sassy as the ones in the movies, customer reports.

-Coup in Kyrgyzstan doesn't put country on the map. according to reporter's unsuccessful attempt to locate it on a map.

See what we mean?

P.S. That part about the President coming to town for the weekend? True. We saw it with our own eyes.